Dictionary meaning of Gratification is a pleasure, especially when gained from the satisfaction of desire. We do anything rather everything in life for gratification whether it might be eating, sleeping, working, playing, drinking or smoking, gambling, etc. though right or wrong, healthy or unhealthy, profitable or not – we do them for gratification only.
Most of the times, to achieve our goals we have to do have to sacrifice some things or current habits that provide us instant gratification, but don’t benefit us in the longer run. And, unless we do sacrifice them we cannot reach our aims because achieving our goal.
Achieving our goal is more like an if – then relationship, if you do something then only you will get something (what you want) and if you don’t do something then only you can get what you want. We shall discuss more about the second scenario than the first one in this post.
If you do, then only you will get
Life is not like a Restaurant where you order everything you want, enjoy whatever you have ordered and then pay for it, but it is like a Cafeteria where you have to pay the price first and then only you can enjoy what you want. – Brian Tracy
So, for reaching our dreams we have to cultivate some habits which we don’t have currently. But, unless we possess them it would not possible to reach our goal. Say, if you have to win a racing competition then though you have habit of exercising or not before you have get out of your bed & start exercising. Doing exercise is the doing part which is very tough, not sleeping or avoiding sleep is the not doing part which is even more tougher then doing.
If you don’t, then only you will get
Successful people do the things which failures don’t like to do,
then what are those things ? Those which are not liked by successful people either but still they do them. Though they feel like doing them or not, that is the secret of success – Brian Tracy
To achieve or accomplish something worthwhile we have to work hard or sometimes very hard but working hard will give us a good chance to achieve our goals but does working hard give us gratification? NO, not and it is sometimes even exactly opposite to Gratification, it is pain instead of pleasure.
We feel tiny and broke due to the burden of failure, hard work and wish to quit working. Then what shall be done? Choose the things that provide instant gratification ? or delay the gratification? Let us analyze these terms keenly so that we can end up with a proper and useful technique to deal this problem.
Along with the things that you need to do, the things that you should not do are equally or more important because the things that you should avoid to reach your goal if done, or not stopped might result in obstructing you from achieving your goal.
Instant vs Delayed Gratification
A test of gratification
There was an experiment conducted on this subject by Dr.WALTER MISCHEL & Dr. Zimbardo by studying kids & marshmallow and it is famously known as The marshmallow experiment to check the effect of delayed gratification
Brief of Experiment: In the experiment the professor offers each and every child a marshmallow (a sweet / a chocolate) and promises the child to give another one if he can wait without eating it until the professor returns back to the room after some time. If the child eats the first one, then he cannot get the second one.
Aim of Experiment : To check how many kids can resist the temptation of eating the marshmallow present in front of them in order to eat the extra one which comes if they wait.
The experiment is recorded to demonstrate the feelings and acts of children to resist the temptation (& a very similar behavior is found in grown ups as well to resist Temptations), most of them fail while very few pass – let’s see the experiment.
Why to Delay & How to Delay Gratification?
Gratification comes in the doing, not in the results – James Dean
In the above video, Dr. Zimbardo mentions that the kids who have participated in the experiment were approached after fifteen years. Surprisingly, he found that the children who have resisted the temptation of eating the marshmallow until the professor has returned were doing very well both academically and personally compared to those who couldn’t resist it.
It proves the fact that the children or a person who can resist his temptation for a greater or more important cause will have an excellent chance to achieve his or her goal than any other individual who cannot delay it.
How can we delay gratification?
It is difficult to delay gratification it but it is not impossible, most of the people cannot delay it because it is difficult but there is no other option other than delaying it. Swami Vivekananda’s quote is of a great use here – Give the same amount of importance to means and Goal . Consider our entertainment is our marshmallow which is readily available to us in our front and our other marshmallow is obtained by delaying entertainment right now and focusing on something productive and if we focus always on the marshmallow then there is no other task left in our mind other than
- Eating the marshmallow available in front of us & repenting later that we didn’t get the another
- Just waiting for the time to come, so that we can get another marshmallow
Instead of simply concentrating on our goal & enjoying the entertainment we can focus on the means to get to the goal so that we can take an eye of the marshmallow (entertainment / instant gratification). By doing this we can enjoy both the marshmallows later on after we achieve our goals. By constant focus on our work to get to the goal and delaying our instant gratification we can get to our goal for sure.
Let’s start our journey in delaying our instant / short – term gratification for enjoying a perfect/ long – term / delayed gratification in the future.
Thanks for reading. Share your views about Instant & Delayed, Short – term & Long – term gratification and about the post with me through comments – I would be jubilant to hear them. Do Share the post with your buddies if you like it.
Bye …. Take care. ..